“Hey there, how are you? Howya doing today?”

This is probably the most common opening line I get from people I meet. It breaks the ice, it makes the person look as if he cares for your well-being and of course, you are forced to answer something equally positive.

Unfortunately, the only thing I ever tell them is “Busy lor”.

I mean, what else can I say?

“I’m doing great man, the kids have grown up and I now enjoy holidays around the planet on my own time!”

“Absolutely fantastic, I just don’t know what to do with the $15,000 I earn every month.”

“Horrid. My mistress is bugging me, my casting agent keeps sending me SMSes and I don’t know what to do about being so handsome.”

“I feel flagellated. Don’t know what that means? Do I look like a dictionary to you?”

“I’m not sure, I just got my seminiferous tubules tied. Too fertile lah. And you?”

“Hey I’m fine. I don’t do anything at work, my maid is a real looker, my kids stay out all the time and I love my Gahmen! So you voting for them soon?”

3 Replies to “Greetings”

  1. Actually i hate it when people ask me that… esp. in my line of work. I find it so hypocritical lor… people ask but they don’t really want a reply.

    And i hate it ‘cos i’m not the kind that can casually give a standard, “oh great!” or “fine man! how about yourself?” kind of person. I like to think through my answers before giving them and it irks me ‘cos i know people don’t usually care about the answer lor.

    I always catch people by surprise when i give a truthful answer like, “i’ve been sick for 2 weeks” or “worried ‘cos my rabbit is sick”, or “freaking pissed off ‘cos my new hp has bugs”…. then i’ll get this, “HAR?” & i can see the question marks all over their heads. It’s like they NEVER expect u to give a decent answer so when u give anything more than a one-liner, they dunno how to respond liao.

    Bleah! I hate that question.

  2. Actually, I don’t know why people don’t question why I keep giving the same answer all the time.

    Either they’ve forgotten our earlier encounters, or they hear “Busy lor” so often it is accepted on the same level as “Great!”, “I’m good!” or “Lovely, and you’re so pretty today!”

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